Monday, December 10, 2007

Promises and Memories



Willow tree figurines have been special to me from the moment I first saw them, and now they are even more precious.

I started collecting them when I first met my husband. He got me the "Together" figurine for my birthday and proposed to me later that year. My family started to catch on that I liked Willow Tree so I started getting and giving the angels as gifts.

For our first Christmas after we were married, Dave gave me the first installment to my nativity set (the leading roles of the Christmas story) with the promise that each year he would add to it until I had the whole Nativity collection. We never had a second Christmas together. In September of 2005 we were in a car accident together and he didn't make it. We were moving up to Fort St. John where he had started a new job and had been working for the two and a half months prior. I stayed behind to pack up our place and get things ready for the move and he came down a couple days before the moving day. When he arrived, he presented me with a final Willow Tree figurine called "Promise". Two days later, my life changed. I hold on the promises he gave me. Promises that he will never leave me, that he will go to the ends of the earth for me, and that he will always take care of me. In such a way, God makes us promises as a husband just as He is a Father, King, Friend, Comforter....

Nothing is the same as it once was. Nothing except the promises and the memories. I often wonder what he would think of all that has happened over the last year. To some things, he would be shocked and appalled. To other things he would simply be saddened that he can't fix them. But I hope that if he were to see me, and how I have managed through it all, he would be proud. He would rejoice over the strengthened relationships with my family. He would remind me of the choice that he made when he married me while other people have forgotten them.

I just opened up my box of Christmas decorations for the first time since the accident (everything was in storage last year while I recovered), and I was flooded with memories. Christmas does that. Every year, I still try to find the Christmas tree farm with the Winnie-the-Pooh house where we went as kids. I watch "A Christmas Story", "The Snowman", "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas", and occasionally the animated "Rudolph". Come to think of it, TV holds far too many memories of Christmas that it should! I remember how on our first Christmas together we made such a huge breakfast that we invited our landlords to come and help us eat it, and there were still leftovers and other baked goodies that I made! I had bought a Christmas tree that year from the back of some guy's truck in a Wal-Mart parking lot. It was the perfect size, but for reasons that may have been obvious had we checked (like the tree was sitting flush in the stand) the tree was as dry and as brittle as Dennis Rodman's hair. A fire hazard for sure. Dave chopped it up for tinder with his circular saw.

In the box of Christmas ornaments, there was the "First Christmas Together" ornament with our engagement picture that was given to us by my mother, a piece of that first Christmas tree with the year 2005 written on it, but most poignant was my nativity set. I hope to keep adding to it as the years go on because it isn't just memories that I am holding on to; I am holding on to the promise that my life is not yet fulfilled and to every other promise God has for my life. There is more yet to come.

Thank you all for being a part of past, present, and future chapters of my life.

16 comments:

KPetrie said...
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Bonnie said...

My eyes welled up with tears as I read this. The strength and peace that you have shown through this post are incredibly touching. Though we've never met, my heart aches for you in such an intense way. Hoping that God's promises of love and comfort will be very real to you this Christmas. And may your beautiful memories of Dave bring a smile to your face and warmth to your heart.

Thinking of you.

Faye said...
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Jennie said...

Beautiful, Karen, Simply Beautiful

sarah cool said...

babygirl, thank you for sharing this. it was really meaningful to hear this. i'm thinking about you.

KPetrie said...
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Christa said...

That was a very beautiful post Karen! Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing your memories.
Hugs,
Christa

Anonymous said...

Hey..sorry, that was me deleting my comments..weird story, I'll tell ya later! LOL Anyhow..you know what I said, and that's all that matters! :-) mwah!

J&C said...

Love you Karen! Praying for you this Christmas. See you soon?!

Bonnie said...

Thanks for the invite to your monthly get-together... sounds cool. But I'm a bit curious... where exactly do you live? Did you end up moving to Fort St. John? I live in Chilliwack, so I'm unsure of how that would work. But it sounds cool if you are close enough for me to do so :)

Unknown said...

Karen, there is a lot more yet to come for you, of that I am sure. Thank you for sharing your story and for touching my heart.

Leanne said...

What a beautiful and touching post...it makes my heart ache to think of your loss, but at the same time I am so drawn to your strength. I echo Bonnie's comment - I hope that you will feel comfort and much love in this season.

Kaz said...

Bonnie, can you email me at wineology101@hotmail.com?

Wes said...
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Wes said...

Dang -- I got cut off with the last post!

You've experienced more adversity in this past year than some people experience in a lifetime.

I've got a good friend who's dying of ALS. We've prayed for him, but he's still slipping away, and his significant other just wants to take off with their kids and leave him behind. It's sad.

I've also read that the oldest war vet from WW1 died at age 109. I'm 36, I blinked twice and here I am: how did I get here so fast?? Even a full lifespan goes by quickly.

My hope for you and me and all of us who stop and think (instead of focusing on making money) is, how can we spend what time we have left on this earth in doing something that matters for eternity? God's not grading us on how tight a business we run (cough) -- he's grading us on how well we love others.

Don't let life get you down. God's love for us is the light and the heat that keeps us warm when the world is cold. And go light on that Kirkegaard guy -- he was a sad creature ;-)

Anonymous said...

Wow, powerful post!

Thank you for being willing to be vulnerable and write about your memories, and for the beauty with which you tell your story. I'm also very glad for you that you met and married one of those special men who know the value of a promise, and who understand what real love is...I think he'd be proud of you to read this post.

*hug*